I honestly felt like I was the only one putting any effort. I didn't know what was going on because I was never getting anything in return; no reaction, no emotion. I was trapped in my own mind, bubbling with questions and assumptions I wish I could get answered but they never came. If I would, it was almost as if they were riddles trying to poke into my mind; almost as a test to find out how I would react to it. But then again; this could be me over thinking (which is usually the case). I felt as if we needed some time to focus on our lives. Which in the long run was needed. But it feels I have lost something so pure...yet again.
The fear was the issue all along, investing into something you fear to loose. Just like the N & S of a magnet, the two magnetic fields of the same poles will never meet. Is where we are now. Well, this is how I feel. I've been focusing on the important things in my life, I did not mean to just jump ship and leave without saying anything. If that was an issue, I cannot be sorry. I have been too weak in the past where I have not given myself time to work on things that benefited me in the long run. Things have been great, I have to stay focused and positive. I can only hope you are doing the same. Yes, I am aware I might be jumping into conclusions; however, this is all I can give myself since all I have are past experiences & the lack of communication between the two of us.
I read the article you sent me and I have to agree that it sums up everything. It's upsetting it's taken us this long to realize but maybe we were giving each other TOO much hope. We're both naturally dreamers and the creativity & imaginations we have both created I hold extremely close to the chest. They are important to me and I cannot just "throw them away". But rather reading that article, it coming from another one's words, I wish it were your own. I really do not know where you stand at the end of the day. Where ever you are now, please just know I have not disappeared nor have I ever been away. As your friend, I will always be. Please remember this! <3
congratulations on you're graduation dearest.
i do miss you. /end.